Proper Speech

The Precept:

I undertake the training rule to abstain from false speech.

Thich Nhat Hanh's approach:

Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful speech and the inability to listen to others, I am committed to cultivating loving speech and deep listening in order to bring joy and happiness to others and relieve others of their suffering. Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering, I am determined to speak truthfully, with words that inspire self-confidence, joy, and hope. I will not spread news that I do not know to be certain and will not criticize or condemn things of which I am not sure. I will refrain from uttering words that can cause division or discord, or that can cause the family or the community to break. I am determined to make all efforts to reconcile and resolve all conflicts, however small.

Proper Speech is speaking truthfully, not speaking with a forked tongue, not speaking cruelly, not using the truth to cause harm, not gossiping, and not exaggerating.

Proper Speech also includes Listening. We listen not to judge, not to criticize, not to condemn, not to evaluate. We listen so, as in the words of Thich Nhat Hanh, “...with the single purpose in mind to help the other person suffer less.”

When speaking with someone, put down your cell phone. Don't wander with your eyes. Give your attention, your true attention, to the speaker. Listen with respect. Speak with respect.